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Ubbax
Village Dweller
Joined: 18 May 2004
Posts: 20
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| General Maxims regarding Women & Men |
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GENERAL MAXIMS
Romance Mathmatics
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
Office Arithmatic
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
Shopping Math
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
Relationships & Success
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Happiness
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Longevity
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
Propensity to change
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
Discussion techniques
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
[Disclaimer: I take no credit for this list. It's as supplied to me by my Great Aunts]
Ubbax
"it's easier to beg for forgiveness sometimes than ask the wife for permission." - by "Dead husband walking" |
Thu Nov 17, 2005 10:47 am |
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Kamahl
King of Spam
Joined: 29 Apr 2005
Posts: 1668
Location: Slovenia-Ljubljana |
ahahaaahaa man those were something hahahah the last one is the best one lol your next hahaha
_________________
Destroy the dark side, we will
De duistere zijde vernietigen, we zullen
Uničili temno stran, bomo mi
die dunkle Seite zerstören, wir sollen |
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Thu Nov 17, 2005 11:02 am |
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