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Jabberwocky
Noble Knight
Joined: 06 Nov 2003
Posts: 208
Location: New York, USA |
| If only the real world were like Gothic... or maybe not?? |
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Even though I've been frequenting the forums, it's been a while since I actually played the game. That's all changed thanks to the english subtitle translation team and Rollenspiel- shop. I'm now chugging away at NOTR and lovin' every minute! The game has brought back a lot of fond memories, and so I would like to outline for everyone MY personal reasons for thinking it would be cool to be the Gothic hero in real life:
10) You can jog 24 hrs a day and never be out of breath - Hello olympic gold medal!! 
9) You can grab things from ten feet away
 You can go swimming in 75 lbs of body armor without fear of drowning, and emerge from the water bone dry
7) You are always guaranteed to sleep well and feel rested - even after a hard day climbing the corporate ladder 
6) You can vent all your frustrations on your boss, and once finshed, cast 'Oblivion' on him - he won't remember a thing! 
5) Never have trouble fitting all you need into a suitcase - you can carry everything short of a building in your back pocket
4) Never have to worry about identity theft... after all, you don't have one 
3) You can be the only guy on earth wearing a pony tail, and women will still give you the time of day
2) Around every corner there are loads of free stuff to find - money... concert tickets.... spell scrolls for lighting your boss on fire...
1) You'll never waste time at a business function talking to someone unimportant - the people who can get you somewhere will all be identified with names posted above their heads
Of course, there would be some drawbacks to such a world as well:
10) Every time you turn around the world needs saving
9) Food may be cheap and easy to come by, but moss isn't that tasty
Between wolves, wargs, lurkers, lizards, and bloodflies, the morning commute would be a bitch 
7) No such thing as King sized beds - it's either a single or you stay up.
6) You can't call in sick because everyone knows that drinking a health potion or two will instantly heal you. 
5) If you're late for work and live more than a couple miles away, you sure as hell better have a 'Teleport to the Office' rune or you're screwed
4) If you're making out with your girl and say something retarded like "What's my name?!?" She couldn't answer you even if she wanted to
3) You are the only man alive still wearing a pony tail, and there isn't a barber shop on the planet
2) You've only met one woman in your life who bathes regularly (remember Gothic 1  )
1) Slaying an undead Dragon would be a breeze compared with convincing Atari to let you travel to an English speaking country... oh, wait... that is the real world 
_________________
"D'oh! I knew I should've saved sooner!" |
Thu Jun 10, 2004 8:24 am |
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Uocjat
High Emperor
Joined: 06 Mar 2003
Posts: 706
Location: deep in the dungons of area 51 |
well i think it would be cool there could be a few things that would be easyer ..
like if some freak wont let you into the local pub you just knock him out and when he comes too he'll just be cool whit it .. maybe praise you for a fair fight
and like warping from one day to another in a sec whitout haveing to lie in bed for hours trying to fall asleep
and being able to jump off 10 feet high cliffs and then just eat a few mushrooms and walk on whitout a scratch
being able to make 3 swords out of one peice of steel in 5 secs
and being able to run around town whit a huge two handed sword and a crossbow on your back whitout anyone giveing a damn
and ofcause you'd be more or less immortal just eat some plant and your good
true there could be some down sides
only haveing limited things to speak whit peole about and after awhile they be telling you the same thing over and over
weird people in black randomly possing you so you cant sleep
and not being able to get rid of weird guys called mud allways following you and telling you about how they love animals
not being able to get drunk no matter how many kegs of ale you drank
haveing to fight trolls 100 times your own size to impress some freak working for some of your friends
not being able to leave your own town whitout getting fryed untill you kill a big ugly deamon
and worst of all .. not being able to play gothic cuz theyd be no computers... |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 9:50 am |
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Daedalus
High Emperor
Joined: 04 Jan 2002
Posts: 2516
Location: Estonia |
tho a nice plus would be also u wont get into fire if u sit or stand right on the fireplace  |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 2:56 pm |
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Chekote
Where’s my Banana?!?!
Joined: 08 Mar 2002
Posts: 1540
Location: Dont know, looks kind of green |
@ Jabberwocky:
Very funny, I like it 
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IMHO my opinion is humble |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 3:08 pm |
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Wulf
The Shepherd
Joined: 20 Sep 2003
Posts: 2312
Location: North/West.England |
But havn't mentioned the best thing,
 MARVIN
Imagine in real life to be able to walk through walls, - - or insert a thousand dollars in you wallet at any time, or flying through the air to work each morning, - - - or, - - to insert a beautiful dancing girl in your hotel room,
Yeah! - - I'll drink to that.
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Forever aches my wretched soul, for Chromanin locked in that dark hole, though crypted key i've yet to learn, he knows one day i will return. |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 3:33 pm |
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Chekote
Where’s my Banana?!?!
Joined: 08 Mar 2002
Posts: 1540
Location: Dont know, looks kind of green |
Or your about to get mugged, and you use Marvin mode to switch bodies with the mugger, and then stab yourself!
how bizarre...
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IMHO my opinion is humble |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 3:39 pm |
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Yamcha
Noble Knight
Joined: 01 May 2004
Posts: 224
Location: Mirna Pec, blizu Novega mesta, Slovenia |
Or shit your pants when you first see a dragon
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Can't think of anything smart |
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Thu Jun 10, 2004 8:27 pm |
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NeoCodex
Captain of the Guard
Joined: 30 May 2004
Posts: 187
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lol very good and funny
great topic  |
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Fri Jun 11, 2004 12:59 pm |
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Daedalus
High Emperor
Joined: 04 Jan 2002
Posts: 2516
Location: Estonia |
quote:
Originally posted by Yamcha
Or shit your pants when you first see a dragon
lol yeah u know why its a + actually ? u cant smell the stink and anyone cant see that u did it |
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Fri Jun 11, 2004 6:41 pm |
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Sem
Solid as a Rock
Joined: 01 Mar 2004
Posts: 3386
Location: at the Dot |
- Every man in leather armor will start attacking you as soon as they notice you.
- In the clothing shop you will first have to do all kinds of annoying jobs before you can buy new jeans.
- There will be an awfully lot of creatures running through the streets.
but you could also
- Wear fancy armor when going to school.
- Get some pay from some fat ass farmer for hanging around on his farm and doing nothing.
- Put a burning torch back in your pocket without feeling any heat let alone pain.
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"Who are we to call this planet Earth, when it's clearly Ocean."
-- News Editor of GothicDot --
-- Moderator of the RPGDot Shadows --
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Fri Jun 11, 2004 9:31 pm |
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Jabberwocky
Noble Knight
Joined: 06 Nov 2003
Posts: 208
Location: New York, USA |
You guys have thought of a lot of great ones too. I'm cracking up! 
_________________
"D'oh! I knew I should've saved sooner!" |
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Tue Jun 15, 2004 7:06 am |
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Daedalus
High Emperor
Joined: 04 Jan 2002
Posts: 2516
Location: Estonia |
Or if everybody hits u there will be no wounds at all u stay same like u are , only the HP line goes a little bit down |
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Tue Jun 15, 2004 12:06 pm |
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Patriot
Small Tiger
Joined: 31 May 2004
Posts: 1421
Location: Athens,Greece |
If it was real everybody would be in the barrier and probably dead all of us. |
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Tue Jun 15, 2004 2:16 pm |
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Sem
Solid as a Rock
Joined: 01 Mar 2004
Posts: 3386
Location: at the Dot |
- You would need a key everytime you want to go to a different city.
- Unknown person can't say more than three different sentences.
- You can roast your meat for ages without burning it.
- To get into the church you will have to pay a thousand euro/dollar/whatever and bring a sheep
_________________
"Who are we to call this planet Earth, when it's clearly Ocean."
-- News Editor of GothicDot --
-- Moderator of the RPGDot Shadows --
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Tue Jun 15, 2004 5:19 pm |
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Jabberwocky
Noble Knight
Joined: 06 Nov 2003
Posts: 208
Location: New York, USA |
quote:
Originally posted by Sem
- To get into the church you will have to pay a thousand euro/dollar/whatever...
Wait a minute.... you mean you DON'T have to do that now?? 
_________________
"D'oh! I knew I should've saved sooner!" |
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Wed Jun 16, 2004 6:38 am |
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