So I figured, what with this being an unlucky day and all, and me normally being unlucky to start off with - well, I thought that maybe there'd be some sort of cosmic re-alignment, you know? We all know that I suck on any given day. But maybe today, right - maybe today I'd be SUPAH

Think about it: today's the day everyone else gets to feel like I do EVERY DAY. So wouldn't it be only fair for me to live this day as something close to normal?