Expansion packs; they cause me to convulse like a man who has foolishly crammed volcanically hot curry into his mouth in an attempt to impress women (note: simile is not autobiographical). They used to be such pure things, as well. I remember back in the halcyon days of the Spectrum and Amiga, when an expansion/add on actually meant quality and content. Then opened up the very bowels of Gehenna, vomiting forth The Sims. As a game, The Sims was tolerable enough. EA, however, heard the call of Mammon, and rained down upon us Sims expansion packs. How the people danced for joy at the very idea. How the people are blinkered fools. Do they not see that they spent £20 for a few new costumes, a new area and a token gimmick such as pets or magic? Obviously not. Thanks to The Sims, the expansion pack has become a vile hydra, dripping deceit with each claim of ‘new content’. SpellForce now proffers such a thing, and I querulously accepted, like the ‘trial of the woodbeast’ in the camp and gaudy Flash Gordon film. But will I have to get Peter Duncan to kill me, to spare me the madness?