Dear Mr. Stephen King,

You do not know me, but I am writing about your book Dreamcatcher. It is a good book, but I think it could be made much better. I am not a professional writer, but I have taken alot (that's two words, right?) of writing in college. It was mostly in Spanish and C++ but I still know how to write. I am sure I know your book better than you do because you have written many books since 2001, but I just read your book so you should listen to me and do what I suggest. I am writing this letter to help you make better books. I have read lots of scary books so I am a master at knowing all about scary books and you could obviously learn a lot from me, so read carefully what I tell you in this letter.

First, what is with the retard kid? Nobody likes retards so you should take him out of the story. Instead you should have a ninja, or maybe a pirate. Everyone likes ninjas and pirates, they are very popular. All my friends agree that ninjas and pirates are cool but nobody likes retards. You should also change the name because pirates and ninjas don't have names like "Duddits". I think a story about pirates and ninjas and aliens and maybe cowboys would be so cool and everyone would buy it. You would probably sell about a billion more books if you took just this one idea.